So, just a little update on the status of my ankle … because I know that you are all just positively losing sleep over not knowing whether or not my ankle is still swollen to the size of a softball..
Well, it’s a little bit better! The swelling has finally completely gone away, and though it is still bruised, it is not nearly as bad as it was last week! It still hurts, especially if I accidentally turn it a certain way. But for the most part it is doing much better and I even started Insanity back up! I hate that I was set back so many days and I am just in general really mad at myself, which I know is ridiculous but I just can’t help it…. grr. I have to work on this whole negative self talk thing that I constantly do. I think that one of my New Years Resolutions should be to try to lessen how often I talk down to myself. In fact, everyone should have this resolution. You are your own worst enemy after all. I can’t tell you how many times I have told myself that I am too, “fat”, “pathetic,” or, “weak,” to complete a task or workout. I think that most people do this, and it’s not healthy. Your mind can convince your body that it isn’t strong, enough, even when it is. In the same way, you can mentally tell yourself that you are adequate, strong, and good enough… that is how you succeed in life. That is what I one day want to be able to do. To be able to talk myself up instead of down.
Now, that tangent I just went off on actually does actually relate to how my workout went today… but first I want to show you a picture of my oatmeal from this morning because: A) I haven’t had oatmeal in FOREVER, and B) I think I made my oatmeal look super cute (yes I just referred to my food as cute) and I need to share it with SOMEONE because when I tried to show it to my mom she didn’t seem all that excited about it.
May I present to you… Smiley Face Oatmeal Man! He is brown because of cocoa powder by the way.. My mom seemed very concerned by the fact that my oatmeal was dark brown.
Now, onto my workout. This week, the Asylum schedule this week is SUPER terrifying.All of the hardest workouts are lined up back to back and I think I may just die.
Today was Vertical Plyo, this workout has to be the hardest workout in the the entire series, it’s not even hard in a fun way.. It’s just HARD. My legs were already dead from Speed and Agility yesterday and my workout from the day before, so needless to say, I was kinda-sorta terrified for this workout.
That leads me to the whole, talking yourself down and hindering your abilities thing. I know that I can make it through this workout, I have before. Did have to stop a million time stop catch my breath? Yes. But I got through it.
Today, I completely freaked out during the workout. I started saying to myself over and over again how I am too fat and not in shape to do this workout and I ultimately wound up pausing the video for a full 5 minutes while I calmed down. I convinced myself that I wasn’t good enough and it ruined what could have been an amazing workout.
This is why I need to try really hard to change my thought patterns. I know that it won’t be easy, but I need to keep trying.
And now to finish off this almost unintelligible post… here is a pretty (?) picture of my dinner!
Ok maybe it’s not that pretty… Salmon with a side of kale, spinach and mushroom steamed with balsamic and soy sauce.
Tomorrow I am headed back into NYC, with my cousin this time, to do some shopping. Woohoo!