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This Was Supposed To Be A Five Things Friday Post.


Hey everyone! Who’s stoked it’s Friday?

Workout – Insanity Plyometric Cardio Circuit.

So nice to be home for the weekend and able to do Insanity. I miss it when I’m at school! This morning’s workout was originally meant to be a run.. But I had to drive my mom to the train station and my brother to school and I wound up just not having enough time to get in the miles that I wanted to before having to get ready and leave for therapy.

This blog has officially become the most neglected thing in my life (ok, that may be a stretch). In case you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m not exactly a particularly interesting person, nor is my life all that exciting. I have a lot of thoughts that I would love to go on about and share with the world… But they don’t all exactly fit into a nice clean package. What I’m saying is that I am the very definition of a mess. I want to blog about health. I want to blog about eating disorder recovery. I want to blog about my life (who the heck would care about that?!). I want to blog about running. I want to blog about the environment. I want to blog about fashion. I want to blog about music. I just want to write. Basically, I am all over the place… And this results in my getting very overwhelmed (I get overwhelmed way too easily, it’s something that I am working on). Once I’m overwhelmed, I start spiraling down into an anxiety attack. After this begins, I begin to mentally tell myself off for my having no right to be overwhelmed when there are so many people (most people actually) who do so much more than me and get it all done and still have free time and social lives. This results in guilt. Which, you guessed it, results in more anxiety. And the kicker here? This all results in nothing getting done. Basically, I don’t know what I am doing with this blog. I think I put a lot of pressure on myself because I really would love for this blog to become something. It may sound pathetic, but the only type of job that I can see myself having any success in in the future is one that involves blogging or Youtube or anything of the like. Again, it sounds stupid. I know. I mean, I just sound like a spoiled little kid who doesn’t want to get a “real job” ever… Right? The thing is, just with the whole anxiety thing… Being trapped in an office all day or having a very strict schedule just seems like it would result in my having a meltdown. That all being said, hopefully if I keep working at it and meditating and going to therapy, I’ll be able to get over all of this depression and anxiety and then, who knows, maybe I will, somehow, have some actual success in something one day. I don’t really know. I just hope that it’s possible for me. I fee like such a dumb kid with a bad case of, “special snowflake,” syndrome. I know that so many people struggle with my exactly mental issues and I know that many people have it so much worse than me (I’m not saying I have a bad life by any means, just that I have a bad mental state)… And they have success in life and drive and they… They have lives. So who am I to think that I have the right to struggle? Who am I to keep screwing up? To haul myself up away from the world because it all just seems to big and scary and overwhelming? Who am I to think that I can maybe be someone one day instead of having to fall into the the routine of the endlessly getting up daily and going to work in a place that I hate so I can have money to support myself? Who am I to think that maybe I could be different? I just … I don’t know. Oh. As per usual, I sat down to write a light-hearted post about things I’ve been up to lately and instead wound up spewing out a whole bunch of nonsensical angst and musings. Welcome to Snapbacks And Racing Flats kids. But seriously… I apologize if you read my blog. Does anyone read this thing? Hellooooo? I’m currently sitting in a Starbucks with my coffee (blonde roast with soy milk is pretty delicious fyi) and am trying to somehow get my Youtube video that should already be up edited. DSCF3271

Yeah.. Um… this happened. I really wanted to do some sort of Halloween-themed video since I absolutely love Halloween but never get to celebrate it because, well, no friends. Unfortunately, I obviously have no idea why I am doing and my attempt at a Tim Burton’s The Corpse Bride themed makeup look wound up looking like… well… this.

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I also can’t even begin to explain to you what a mess I made of my dorm room while trying to maneuver all of the different face paints and things while filming.

I know that my Youtube channel isn’t exactly ground-breaking or entertaining or even quality… But I am really loving doing it. Aside from school, I feel that I don’t have menu things really driving me in life right now. Yes I have running and I want to train more and get my distance up and sign up for a half-marathon once I have the money… But other than that, I am really struggling to find a sense of purpose.

Now, I know that saying that my little Youtube channel with it’s couple of viewers gives me and my life meaning sounds pretty obscene… But, it does. My Youtube channel is an outlet for me to express myself and be creative and express myself.

It’s no secret that I struggle with self-esteem and body image and, well, human interaction. So this channel is really a way for me to challenge myself. I’m editing my video right now, and I can’t tell you how disgusted I am looking at this thing. Not only did I film this right after getting back from a run (probably not my best idea)… But I can see in in relation so some of my videos from the summer and it is so noticable in my face that I have put on weight.

Needless to say, I would rather not upload this thing.

But I’m going to. I am challenging myself to not care and to try and accept myself as I am and put myself out there. It’s terrifying… And exciting.

And now I am off to finish editing this video and go grocery shopping! Exciting times guys. Exciting times.

To end this post on a happy note, here’s a photo of an adorable puppy in a frog costume.

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Oh, you are so welcome.

I don’t know.

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A New Beginning


Hey!

WorkoutInsanity Cardio Power and Resistance. My arms will indeed be feeling it tomorrow.

At this point, I am just blogging from my phone because my computer is about so slow that I might as well be using dial-up for internet.

Also, I know that I have been super inconsistent with blogging lately, and it’s really bothering me. Thing is, amidst losing Grace, getting ready to to leave for school, and personal issues that I have been dealing with, this blog has kind of taken a back seat. However, I believe that as of today, that will change. I think things may finally be starting to calm down. Here’s hoping.

Anyways…

So, today was the day.

Move in day at my new college.

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Hi Times Square. I love you.

This morning, I was forced to finally accept the reality that is going away to college (when I am dreading something, I have this bad habit of convincing myself that it’s not really happening). It’s not school itself that I was dreading, it was (and is) the unknown. It is not having complete control over my surroundings or my situation.

I know that in saying this, I probably come off as the biggest brat on the planet, but not having control over roommate situations (when she will be in the room, how loud she will be, how many people she will have in the room, what time she will intend to stay up until), sharing the building with people who blast music at all hours of the day (I don’t know if this will be a reality at this school yet, but it definitely was an issue at my old school), and having to deviate from my normal routines (both food, exercise, and just general living) absolutely freaks me out. Seriously, just writing it out is making my heart race.

The problem is also that I really don’t mind living with other people. I’m not complaining about having to share a small room with someone. I’m just freaking out because I don’t have control over my environment, and that is a major anxiety trigger for me.

Also, it definitely doesn’t help that I have no ability whatsoever to assert myself. I would much prefer the people I am surrounded by, or living with, to be happy and to get there way than to argue someone and make them not like me. Again, this is something that I need to work on.

Ok, so now to digress from that little tangent I went off on… This morning, my mom and I packed up the car and drove into the city to go see where I will be living for the next year.

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It was also my mom’s first time driving in Manhattan (we always just take the train into the cities and then either take subways or walk to our destination), so everyone give you a round of applause for conquering such a feat as New York City driving.

Upon arriving at the building that I guess I will be calling home for a while, it was an absolute madhouse. It took my about 20 minutes just to figure out how to get myself all checked in and to get my room key made (worst. id photo. ever.). Then it was another long weight to get my hands on a bin for us to use to get my stuff up the the room.

But somehow, we eventually made it.

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I’m planning on decorating and making my space cute and individualized. Last year, I really never “moved into” my dorm. It was used simply as a place to study, store things, and change my clothes. I barely even slept in my room because my roommates would harass me if I tried to. This year, I really want to focus on making the most out of this little space and filling it with things that will fill me with happy thoughts and good vibes. Basically, I’m just going to hang up a ton of fairy lights and concert posters.

 

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There’s a massive window in the room. You have no clue how happy this makes me.

 

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My roommate actually never showed up, so I have no idea what is going to happen.

Furthermore, my classes don’t actually start until Thursday (though I do have housing orientation in my building on Monday). Then, I only have one class on Thursday, no class on Friday, and off next Monday due to Labor Day. After much thinking, I decided to spend a bulk of this week at home, and will most likely spend next weekend at home as well. The main reason that I wasn’t completely certain if I should spend another week at home was because I didn’t want my roommate to think that I was weird for not staying in the room this week.

Well, it looks like I don’t even have a roommate yet, and I think that it will alleviate some anxiety if I make the transition over to living in my dorm as opposed to here at home as slow and painless as possible. I don’t know, maybe it sounds immature… But I just feel like I’m in a very fragile state right now. I need to take care of myself instead of constantly worrying if other people will think that I am weird.

I also think that a lot of my anxiety over school is due to how incredibly awful and traumatic my experience last year was. I’m not sure if I have ever mentioned this on the blog.. But last year was a really rough one for me. Apart from struggling immensely with both my mental and physical health, my roommates made sure to make my life a living hell. They would spread lies about me, talk about me and make fun of me when they knew I could hear them, come into the room late at night screaming and shaking my bed to wake me up, and many other things. I am just so scared that something like that is going to happen again.

But really, I just need to take a step back and remind myself how lucky I am to be able to be going to school and studying something I love in the city that I love more than anything. I have always dreamed of living in New York City for a period of time, and I am actually going to be able to live that dream this year. I need to make the best of the situation at hand, whether it wind up being awful or amazing. I need to do this to prove to myself that I am not a failure.

I need this to be my year. And I hope that it will be.

 

Question(s):

Anyone who has been or is currently in college – Did you have a roommate? Any horror stories? Any great stories? What was your favorite college memory! Tell me! I want to know!

What songs have you been listening to lately?

I currently have Sanctuary by Utada stuck in my head, and I am certainly not complaining. Quality song right there.

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Mental Health Monday, recovery, Uncategorized

Mental Health Mondays – Types of Outlets and Finding Yours


Happy Monday to you all!

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(Source)

Workout: 

Today was supposed to be a swim day… But after the long and late night that I had last night (there was a baptism at the restaurant I work in last night and let’s just say that it was the craziest and busiest night I have ever had), I decided that it would be best to silence my 6am alarm in favor of another hour or so of sleep.

So Insanity it was!

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My legs and arms are absolutely dead. The great thing about Insanity is that it is all plyometrics, which happens to be my favorite form of cross training! This workout in particular really works the arms, shoulders, and legs (hence the power and resistance in the name =P)… So I am counting it towards my goal to incorporate more strength training in my weekly workouts!

Speaking of those goals…

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You all know that I love my smoothie bowls, and the last couple of days I have incorporated greek yogurt into them to get some quality protein into my system!

I have to say, by adding the greek yogurt I have really been feeling fuller for longer. Plus it makes the consistency of the smoothie bowl a lot creamier! What I have been doing is sticking the greek yogurt into the freezer before my workout in the morning so that by the time I am ready to make my breakfast, it is slightly frosty but not frozen solid.

I also threw some blueberries into this bowl! Look at me changing things up! 😉

So it’s been a couple of weeks since my last Mental Health Monday post. Like I said in my first HMH post, it’s not meant to be a weekly series. I don’t want to put up posts on a topic that is so important to me just for the sake of getting one up each week. I both want and need to be able to put my heart and soul into these posts and I want them to be helpful.

That being said, today I want to talk about different types of positive outlets and how to find the one that is best for you!

So what is a positive outlet?

A positive outlet is, by my definition, an activity that is used as a way of coping with bad thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. The point of having and utilizing these activities is to find healthy and productive ways of dealing with what would usually be a destructive and sometimes dangerous thought patterns.

An outlet can be anything from art to meditation to physical activity.

So where should I start?

I have found, from experience with multiple therapists and doctors, that when one is told to find an outlet… He or she is normally told what to do instead of being given different options.

“Listen to this motivational CD each night while you fall asleep.”

“Meditate.”

“Write it down.”

And trust me, I have tried it all.

And guess what?

None of it worked.

And why?

Because none of those things are enjoyable to me.

So now what?

You find what’s best for you.

Trust me on this, if you hate mediation, then you are doing yourself absolutely no favors by forcing yourself to mediate simply because it’s “the way” to cope with bad thoughts.

Honestly, by forcing yourself to partake in certain conventional coping mechanisms that you hate you will, more likely than not, just create more anxiety within yourself.

And how is that productive?

It’s not.

Now, obviously I don’t know what positive outlet is best for you, nor do I know every single type of outlet on the planet. In fact, no one does. The possibilities are endless! For a positive outlet to be successful in helping you cope, it needs to be individualized for you and your interests and needs!

That being said, I want to share some of my favorite outlets with you to give you somewhere to start. I also want to give examples of different outlets that may cater to different types of people.

So here we go.

For The Creative Type:

1. Write out your feelings… Buy yourself a nice notebooks (I find that having a cute notebook makes me happy and more likely to actually write things down) and write down your thoughts and feelings. This is the most basic form of an outlet. You get to get your feelings out without actually having to tell your deep dark secrets and less-than-cheerful thoughts to an actual person.

2. Write a blog. Now, it’s not normally ideal to spill all of your dark thoughts out on the internet. I mean, that’s as public as it gets. That being said, I know from personal experience that venting on a blog makes me feel  better than just writing in a notebook would because I feel like people  are actually listening even if they’re not. 

A good option as far as what I’ve decided to call diary-blogging goes is to create a blog (Tumblr is great for casual venting) and keep it anonymous. Just write your thoughts and feelings, but leave out any personal feelings. This way, there’s no worrying about someone you know seeing all of your deep dark thoughts.

3. Self help books. Find ones that interest you. My mom loves Wayne Dyer, I can’t get through a page of his books. I like more casually written, almost conversational types of self help books while others may prefer a more scholarly type. It’s all about finding what would be best for you.

4. Self help workbooks. I love these. Basically, they are activity books that cater to your specific needs whether your struggles are with eating disorders, anxiety, depression, OCD, etc. I own this one and I absolutely love it because it focuses on healing through creativity. I have always been an artistic person, and I feel as though my struggles with my mental health have created a road block in my motivation to be creative. So this is a perfect way to get back into things while also bettering my mind! I truly do find it helpful and it’s fun for me so it’s a great outlet!

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For The Mental-Emotional Type:

While I know that the creative type and the mental-emotional type are normally lumped together as being one-in-the-same… But this is not always the case. 

1. Meditation. I know what you’re thinking, “How much more basic can you get?” But it’s important to remember that there is not just one way to meditate. You don’t need to just sit in a quiet room and reflect. Meditation comes in all different shapes and sizes and the only way that it will be helpful is if you find the type that you actually enjoy doing.

So some types…

– Guided meditation – there are all types of guided mediation. Some include visualization, while some focus mainly on times breathing. There is a huge selection of different types of guided mediation sessions on Youtube. There are also CDs that you can buy, but I would recommend the free alternatives until you find the type that is best for you.

– Personal meditation. This is just you, a quiet space, and your thoughts. This is where you attempt to calm your own mind, set intentions for the day, and focus your thoughts on positive ideas.

– Prayer. Basically the spiritual side of personal mediation. I know that prayer has gotten certain members of my family through some really really horrible times. It’s a great option if you are religious.

For The Physical Type:

Personally, exercise has always been my main outlet. I would seriously lose my mind without it. The goal when you using exercise as an outlet is to focus on light to moderate exercise in lieu of more intensive anaerobic or HIIT style workouts. It is no secret that it has been scientifically proven that exercise helps alleviate stress. However, this only applies when the exercise is light to moderate. While you may feel good after high intensity exercise, it actually acts as a stressor… So be wary! I’m not saying to never do high intensity exercise, but if you are trying to exercise away anxiety, it may not be your best option.

Some ideas/examples:

1. Running at an easy to moderate pace for a set period of time.

2. Swimming laps at an easy to moderate pace.

3. Horseback riding… This may sounds a bit odd, but I swear, the combination of the physical activity, your mind being challenged to maintain proper form on the horse (IMPORTANT!), and being around animals (though, if you’re not an animal fan I would assume that this wouldn’t be the best idea) makes equestrian one of the most peaceful and calming activities that I have ever participated in.

4. Dancing it out! … This is good for the body and the soul. How can you not smile while dancing around like a fool to your favorite music? Want to step it up a notch? Grab a wooden spoon or a hairbrush and pretend it’s a microphone while you are dancing and singing. I dare you to not smile while doing this =).

 

In Conclusion…

Obviously, I haven’t even covered a quarter of the possibilities for positive outlets… These are just a few tried and true methods to hopefully get yourself up and on the path to a healthier mind and a happier you.

Just remember that it is crucial that you find what is best for you. Hate running? Don’t do it! Do you have a passion for puppetry? Heck, go for it girl/dude!

This is your journey to happiness, and only you know what is best for you!

I hope you found this helpful, and I will talk to you all tomorrow =).

 

Question(s):

Do you have a positive outlet for when times get tough? What is it?

 

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Family is Everything


Hi guys, once again I have been MIA. I have been home for the last couple of days for spring break, and quite frankly, I kind of forgot about blogging… Not that anything all that interesting has really happened.

I arrived back in the wonderful state of New York Thursday night.

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There are really no words that can properly describe how happy I am to be home. I really needed this break from school and from well… life in general. While this semester has been considerably better than last (I can actually sleep in my own room this semester!), I really haven’t been doing well emotionally. I have had more panic attacks than I have ever had in my lifetime in a short period of time and I have jus honestly been crying a lot and all of that super pathetic stuff. I don’t know… I think that last semester, I was just basically in a constant state of emotional numbness. I’m really a hyper-emotional person. I cry really easily and I just don’t exactly have the best coping mechanisms. That’s why it was so weird last semester when I just didn’t care about anything. I mean, I cared… but not to the extent that I normally do. I just didn’t feel. And now I think that this semester all of it is just flooding back to me and I am really having a hard time coping with everything. I needed this time off. I need to focus on healing myself mentally and physically. 

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Mother-daughter yoga session after my flight

I have a lot of things that I need to do. Lose weight. Get a job. Get good grades. 

And then a lot of things that I want to do. Learn to accept myself. Be more positive. Accomplish my dreams.

I just need to get my head on straight.

Being home has been really nice, albeit uneventful, so far. I get to take baths and cook things and sleep in a real bed. It’s super nice.

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This oatmeal has been my current obsession. 1/4 cup of oats + 1tbs cocoa powder + 1 packet of stevia + vanilla extract + a splash of mint extract = minty, chocolaty deliciousness!

Green juices have also been making a reappearance

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kale, spinach, cucumber, celery, grapes, cilantro, ginger, lemon, and aloe vera

And morning workouts! It’s great to not have to work around when the studio in the gym is open to strength train! This morning, I did the Fine Toning routine from the Tone It Up DVD. I wanted a short workout since I’m still super sore from doing Insanity Max Interval Sports training along with this workout on Friday.

Yesterday’s workout was just a super easy 5 mile run. I was so sore that the fact that I was even able to walk was a shocker.

 

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Now I have some paleo banana bread in the oven! Until tomorrow my friends!

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Working Girl + Some Random Updates


Well… my busy schedule just got a little bit busier…

I got a job!

I will now be working a 25 hour work week… Wow, I am so nervous and so excited at the same time.

Friday morning, I had my interview at 9:30 in the morning. Since I don’t have a car, I had to walk to the mile and a half to the place, meaning I had to leave early. It was a beautiful morning…

And then it wasn’t…

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It started pouring 15 minutes into my walk to work… I didn’t have a jacket or an umbrella… It also got really cold all of a sudden.

I was not a happy camper. I also had to go into my interview soaking wet, not exactly the best first impression to make. I seriously walked in and apologized a million and one times for the fact that I was soaking wet. I seriously did NOT think that I was going to get the job, I looked sloppy and I was tripping over my words due to nerves. All I could think about was the fact that I was going to not get the job and then have to walk home sadly in the rain.

But somehow, I got it!

Another highlight from last weeks was our first fitness evaluation in my biokinetics class. How biokinetics works is that it takes place in both the classroom and in the gym/on the track. We learn about the way the body works and then put that learning to the test outside.  I’m really loving it.

On Wednesday, we had our first fitness evaluation, which was a timed mile. We started with a 1/2 mile jog warm up, squats and lunges, and then we ran our mile. It wasn’t full out or race pace, but it was still for time so we were expected to push. I was so scared that I would finish last and be super embarrassed, but I wound up being the first girl to finish and even beat a couple of the boys! 7:04 seconds, definitely not what I would consider good at all, but it wasn’t race pace. I’m aiming for 6:40 at the next evaluation.

And now for some random updates on my life that you probably don’t care about…

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Here’s a picture of my current lunch obsession. I’ve been addicted to dipping broccoli in honey mustard. My cafeteria also makes these really good wheat berry/cranberry/quinoa salads.. Bread is (unfortunately) always necessary for me.

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I also have apparently been spelling my name wrong my entire life.

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Did this workout from Tone It Up yesterday and felt great! It’s been a while since I’ve felt great during a workout.

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Watched Tangled with my friend Shannon last night and cried (ok not really) about our single-ness.

 

How have your lives been lately?

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Weekend in Recap


Hey everyone!

I had a really good weekend… one of the best ones that I have had in a while really. Yes, I know that it is Tuesday so it’s kind of weird to be doing a post about the weekend… But I’m going to pretend that Monday was part of the weekend!

My mom went away for the weekend (she went up to a spa with her friends to celebrate her birthday and also her friend’s 5 year anniversary of being cancer free) so my brother and I went to stay with my grandparents. I guess it’s kind of weird that I am a college student yet I still need to stay with someone when my mom goes away, but staying with my grandparents is one of my favorite things! It was my second weekend in a row staying with them and it was just oh so wonderful.

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This is what typical mornings look like at my grandparents’ house! Egg whites, coffee, and a good book. I am currently reading Wasted by Marya Hornbacher, a book I have wanted to read for years. It is a memoir about her life living with anorexia and bulemia. So far I am absolutely loving it, it shows a different side of eating disorders besides the falsities that are often portrayed in the media and society in general. I need to make more time to read when I get back to school. I love it so much.

Another wonderful thing about staying with my grandparents is that I get to sleep in my mother’s old bedroom. It still has a couple of her things, including a teddy bear that my dad gave to her.

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I love cuddling up with this thing when I sleep. I always seem to sleep better (and actually sleep through the night) when I am at my grandparents’ house. I don’t really know what it is, my anxiety just doesn’t seem to be as bad there. It’s like the house is surrounded by a little bubble of safeness.

On Saturday, I went to a concert! Quick fact about me, music is probably what I love most on this planet (besides my family of course). Even above running, I have never felt the same love and passion for anything that I feel with music. My best friend and I traveled into the city to see the Glamor Kills Holiday Show at The Studio at Webster Hall. Now let me just say that there really is nothing like New York City at night, it was about a 25 minute walk from Penn Station to the concert venue and it was just so pretty!

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(The opening bands were a little bit different because the date had to be changed due to weather. Misser and Elder Brothers weren’t there)

I had never been to this venue before and it definitely was not what I expected. It was basically a teeny tiny basement! We were all jam packed together, yet it was also kind of awesome because we were so close to the stage. I actually wound up right up at the stage for Hit The Lights (GO CHECK THEM OUT! THEY ROCK!) and I got to jump up and down and sing and got to help hold up the lead singer when he crowd surfed. They played a whole record from start to finish and just oh my goodness it was such a great night. I also really love State Champs, and they were also so good.

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Oh, and at the very end of the concert I caught one of the drummer’s drum sticks… One of the highlights of my life night I must say. My friend and I had an absolutely amazing time and we left the concert dehydrated, drenched in sweat, exhausted, and as happy as physically possible.

We headed back to Penn station at a little after midnight and were completely mesmerized by the unique world that is NYC on a Saturday night… I swear, it will never get old to me.

It was also super foggy so the buildings looked super spooky and cool!

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Yesterday, I got to wish a happy birthday to the most amazing woman in the world.

My mom.

She is honestly just the strongest, and most amazing person that I know. She deals with me and my problems, I know that that isn’t easy. She single handedly takes care of my family. She is so funny and kind and empathetic and I know that I am going to be one of those people that grows up and pretty much becomes their mother… And honestly, I think that growing up to be life her would be one of the greatest gifts that could be given to me. I am so thankful that she is my mom.

For her birthday, we went out to eat up the block from us with my brother and my grandparents.

I had a roasted beet salad with candied walnuts and shrimp.

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It was pretty good, I didn’t love how the shrimp were cooked though.

We then went home and invited my cousin, her husband, and their baby over for cake.

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I made my mom a chocolate layer cake with raspberry filling and chocolate ganache frosting (recipe here), and let me just tell you that my blood, sweat, and tears went into the making of this cake.  Seriously, everything that could possibly go wrong with this cake went wrong. It completely fell apart, I burned the ganache on the first try… Oh boy was it a mess… But somehow I managed to mush it together into something that looked mildly presentable!!

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Plus, the taste got rave reviews and a “TANKEW ENN(my name in baby talk)!” from my 1 1/2 year old cousin… So I guess that makes it a winner.

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I hope you all had a terrific Tuesday!

Goodnight!

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Sports Training and I Can’t Feel My Arms


Hey everyone! I was originally going to type this post super late last night (as I always seem to do), but instead, I thought that it would be better to just type it this morning and get myself into the habit of blogging in the morning. This way, I will be able to spend more time on my posts and have them actually make sense haha.

The first thing that I want to talk about it yesterday’s workout. I’m pretty sure that I mentioned that I have been somewhat losing motivation as far as Asylum goes.  I’m just so ready for it to be over. As much as I enjoy having a set workout routine planned out, it’s starting to get a bit stale. I miss running and speed work and I also really miss my gym. I’m only going to be home for a little over a week (just typing that makes me want to cry) which means that I am not going to be able to go back to my gym here at home until Spring break. I even considered not doing my Insanity workout yesterday in favor of some speed work…. But honestly, I know that I will never forgive myself if I quit. So, I continue on.

Yesterday was Game Day, I’m pretty sure that this is my favorite workout in the series.

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This workout consists of multiple, sport centered circuits. These sports include track, wrestling, basketball, speed skating, tennis, swimming, surfing, football, baseball, and rock-climbing. For me, this is the most enjoyable workout in the series. At a little over an hour, it is also the longest.

It’s definitely not the hardest workout (vertical plyo makes me want to cry), but there are some exercises that I can hardly get through one rep of… Obviously, these are mostly the upper-body centered exercises. I posted an example of some of these ridiculous exercises on my instagram here. These moves are from the rock climbing portion of the workout, which in my opinion is the hardest. I also really struggle with wrestling, speed skating, and football. My favorite parts are tennis and surfing.

After Game Day… I had to do Overtime. Overtime is a supplemental workout that you are supposed to do when you feel like you can keep going after your workouts (psssh as if). It is 13 minutes of explosive movements (think lunge to tuck jumps) that is done with Shaun T and two military guys. I thought I was going to die.

Today is Vertical Plyo, I really don’t like this workout and last time I am not happy with how I did with it. Hopefully, today will be better as long as I go into it with a better attitude. I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN. Plus, after today, I only need to do this workout one more time!!

Yesterday, I also tried really hard to challenge myself to eat 5 small meals like I am supposed to.

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A sub-par attempt at overnight oats.

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The best mint chocolate chip shake ever.

1 scoop chocolate protein powder

1/2 cup soy milk

1 cup water

1 1/2 cup ice cubes

2 packets of stevia

Some carob chips that were thrown in in the end

Oh my goodness, so good!

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Green juice with carrots, beet, kale, spinach, ginger, lemon juice, and aloe vera.

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Spiralized squash with zucchini, peppers, mushroom, chicken, sprouts, and tomato sauce.

Before my workout, I also had some rice crackers and celery with a small amount of sunflower seed butter and then picked at nuts throughout the day.

To be completely honest, I had to force myself to eat my dinner. I felt so uncomfortable and large and like I gained another 5 pounds just from the day (yes I know that this isn’t possible). I know that the reason that my metabolism is so slow is because I typically don’t eat as much as I should, although I always feel like I eat too much, and that I need to eat more to fix it… It’s just so hard.

But I am going to keep trying! Today is a new day!

 

Have a wonderful Thursday =).

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