This Was Supposed To Be A Five Things Friday Post.

Hey everyone! Who’s stoked it’s Friday?

Workout – Insanity Plyometric Cardio Circuit.

So nice to be home for the weekend and able to do Insanity. I miss it when I’m at school! This morning’s workout was originally meant to be a run.. But I had to drive my mom to the train station and my brother to school and I wound up just not having enough time to get in the miles that I wanted to before having to get ready and leave for therapy.

This blog has officially become the most neglected thing in my life (ok, that may be a stretch). In case you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m not exactly a particularly interesting person, nor is my life all that exciting. I have a lot of thoughts that I would love to go on about and share with the world… But they don’t all exactly fit into a nice clean package. What I’m saying is that I am the very definition of a mess. I want to blog about health. I want to blog about eating disorder recovery. I want to blog about my life (who the heck would care about that?!). I want to blog about running. I want to blog about the environment. I want to blog about fashion. I want to blog about music. I just want to write. Basically, I am all over the place… And this results in my getting very overwhelmed (I get overwhelmed way too easily, it’s something that I am working on). Once I’m overwhelmed, I start spiraling down into an anxiety attack. After this begins, I begin to mentally tell myself off for my having no right to be overwhelmed when there are so many people (most people actually) who do so much more than me and get it all done and still have free time and social lives. This results in guilt. Which, you guessed it, results in more anxiety. And the kicker here? This all results in nothing getting done. Basically, I don’t know what I am doing with this blog. I think I put a lot of pressure on myself because I really would love for this blog to become something. It may sound pathetic, but the only type of job that I can see myself having any success in in the future is one that involves blogging or Youtube or anything of the like. Again, it sounds stupid. I know. I mean, I just sound like a spoiled little kid who doesn’t want to get a “real job” ever… Right? The thing is, just with the whole anxiety thing… Being trapped in an office all day or having a very strict schedule just seems like it would result in my having a meltdown. That all being said, hopefully if I keep working at it and meditating and going to therapy, I’ll be able to get over all of this depression and anxiety and then, who knows, maybe I will, somehow, have some actual success in something one day. I don’t really know. I just hope that it’s possible for me. I fee like such a dumb kid with a bad case of, “special snowflake,” syndrome. I know that so many people struggle with my exactly mental issues and I know that many people have it so much worse than me (I’m not saying I have a bad life by any means, just that I have a bad mental state)… And they have success in life and drive and they… They have lives. So who am I to think that I have the right to struggle? Who am I to keep screwing up? To haul myself up away from the world because it all just seems to big and scary and overwhelming? Who am I to think that I can maybe be someone one day instead of having to fall into the the routine of the endlessly getting up daily and going to work in a place that I hate so I can have money to support myself? Who am I to think that maybe I could be different? I just … I don’t know. Oh. As per usual, I sat down to write a light-hearted post about things I’ve been up to lately and instead wound up spewing out a whole bunch of nonsensical angst and musings. Welcome to Snapbacks And Racing Flats kids. But seriously… I apologize if you read my blog. Does anyone read this thing? Hellooooo? I’m currently sitting in a Starbucks with my coffee (blonde roast with soy milk is pretty delicious fyi) and am trying to somehow get my Youtube video that should already be up edited.

Yeah.. Um… this happened. I really wanted to do some sort of Halloween-themed video since I absolutely love Halloween but never get to celebrate it because, well, no friends. Unfortunately, I obviously have no idea why I am doing and my attempt at a Tim Burton’s The Corpse Bride themed makeup look wound up looking like… well… this.

I also can’t even begin to explain to you what a mess I made of my dorm room while trying to maneuver all of the different face paints and things while filming.

I know that my Youtube channel isn’t exactly ground-breaking or entertaining or even quality… But I am really loving doing it. Aside from school, I feel that I don’t have menu things really driving me in life right now. Yes I have running and I want to train more and get my distance up and sign up for a half-marathon once I have the money… But other than that, I am really struggling to find a sense of purpose.

Now, I know that saying that my little Youtube channel with it’s couple of viewers gives me and my life meaning sounds pretty obscene… But, it does. My Youtube channel is an outlet for me to express myself and be creative and express myself.

It’s no secret that I struggle with self-esteem and body image and, well, human interaction. So this channel is really a way for me to challenge myself. I’m editing my video right now, and I can’t tell you how disgusted I am looking at this thing. Not only did I film this right after getting back from a run (probably not my best idea)… But I can see in in relation so some of my videos from the summer and it is so noticable in my face that I have put on weight.

Needless to say, I would rather not upload this thing.

But I’m going to. I am challenging myself to not care and to try and accept myself as I am and put myself out there. It’s terrifying… And exciting.

And now I am off to finish editing this video and go grocery shopping! Exciting times guys. Exciting times.

To end this post on a happy note, here’s a photo of an adorable puppy in a frog costume.

Oh, you are so welcome.

I don’t know.

Doing What I Love – Style Saturday 9.27.2014

Hey!

I feel the need to preface this post with saying that I am feeling quite a bit… not better per say… but, more… emotionally stable than I was yesterday. This means that this post won’t be nearly as cringey and melodramatic and depressing as yesterdays! Woohoo!

Workout – An hour of elliptical intervals. 

My leg is definitely feeling a little bit better than it did yesterday. It still hurts, but I was able to actually get down the stairs without having to crawl down them today! Baby steps people. Baby steps.

Now the main goal is to keep up with the R.I.C.Eing and not running (I have a bad habit of coming off of injuries the moment they start showing any signs of getting better… Needless to say, this results in reinsuring myself) or doing any other intense/high impact exercises.

Anyways…

When I originally decided to name this blog Snapbacks and Racing Flats, there was a reason behind my choice for this name. A reason that has since fallen to the side.

I originally started writing this blog in 2011, right after having recently been released from the hospital for anorexia and having lost my father. I called the blog Erin Learns To Live because, well, I really did have to relearn how to actually live this life of mine. My world had been turned upside down, I had been prisoner to my mental disorder. I didn’t know how to live life like a normal person should. Actually, I am still trying to learn how to live.

However, I wound up deleting all of my posts from that blog because I didn’t want this blog to be solely focused on my eating disorder. I wanted this blog to be about me, and I am so much more than my diagnosis.

Funny how it seems that this blog has really just become about exactly what I didn’t want it to be about. I think I had to accept that my eating disorder, my anxiety, my depression, they are all a part of me… And I cannot fully express myself without expressing my full self. And whether I like it or not, my diagnosis’s really are a part of me.

Digressing now… I renamed this blog Snapbacks and Racing Flats, because I wanted this blog to be about all of the things that I love in life… All of the things that make me, well, me. And I definitely have a lot of interests.

The two interests that stuck out to me the most were, of course, running (and just health and fitness in general) and fashion/beauty. Thus, Snapbacks and Racing Flats was born. I also really wanted to include music, since I love music more than anything… But my blog name was already longer than I wanted it to be haha.

Anyway, I really want to get back into expressing my whole self on this blog instead of just using it as a platform to rant and complain. That’s what Tumblr is for! =P

I made a couple of Style Saturday posts back in the day, and then, like most things that I start, fell off the routine of these posts as soon as things in life started getting to be too much.

So I want to reintroduce this series. I don’t know if it will be every week, or if you guys will even have any interest in it. For now, I just want to share some clothing items/outfits that I both found online and put together in sets on Polyvore. Eventually, if I can get a tripod/build up the confidence/build up my wardrobe, I would absolutely love to start doing weekly outfit posts… So we shall see!

Well, now that the world’s longest intro to a blog post is done… It’s time to share some outfits/clothing items that have excited for the upcoming autumn season!

I don’t actually own anything with a peter pan collar as I am always unsure if I would be able to pull them off… However, I think they are absolutely adorable, especially when worn under an oversized sweater! I’m also a huge leggings girl and printed leggings are, in  my opinion, some of best statement pieces that one can add to a plain outfit. I feel that this outfit would look super cute with either a pair of faux suede maryjane flats or faux suede creepers!

I feel that this outfit is just a prime example of how one can dress up super basic pieces to make an edgy and trendy outfit. I am currently on the hunt to find the perfect (affordable) black booties for winter. I feel that they are one of the most necessary pieces for fall/winter. Yet, I have never owned a pair! I really love the layered black shirt sleeves poking through from under the white top, and then you can never go wrong with throwing on a good anorak jacket over an outfit!

This is just a compilation of jackets that I am currently drooling over from one of my favorite online shopping sites, Yesstyle. It is a site that sells asian fashion brands and I am obsessed with pretty much everything. Especially that pink moto jacket. Alas, it is over 200 dollars and will forever remain nothing more than a pin on my “epic wish list” Pinterest board *dramatic sigh*.

Just an outfit that I would, and more likely than not, will be wearing very frequently this fall. I love velvet leggings and I really want to get a colored pair. Paired with all black everything else, the pop of color in the leggings really gives the outfit a special something without being too much.

Also, this outfit would be cozy comfy as anything!

And now, I am off to try to get some sleep giving that I haven’t gotten more than 5 hours of sleep in a night since May. I can slowly feel myself losing it.

Goodnight!

Question(s):

What clothing item are you most excited to wear this Fall?

Anyone hear any good music lately? I need some new jams (did I really just say jams?!)  to listen to!

Injured Again

Hey guys.

I really am trying to get back into the swing of blogging. Like I said the other day, I miss it. And I am in desperate need of an outlet… Especially now.

Warning: this post is going to be even more depressing and lacking in energy than usual. It will also very likely be mildly melodramatic. Proceed with caution.

Workout – 30 minute interval cycling workout on the stationary bike + 25 minutes of intervals on the elliptical.

So, as the title kind of already says, I am injured. Again.

My life for a while.

During my run the other day, I was feeling sharp, but not unbearable, pain in my inner ankle/calf region of my right leg. I figured that the muscle was just tight, as my calve muscles typically are, and that the hills of Central Park were just getting to me. I thought I just had to get used to the uneven terrain and hills of Central Park. Nothing to worry about. I was just thrilled that the deep blisters on my heels were finally recovered enough to be able to actually run without having to stop due to pain.

The next day, I did speed work on the treadmill and felt fine. Actually, I felt great. Such a great workout. I was stoked.

So after my workout, I packed up my things and went home for the long weekend. That evening, I noticed that the muscle in my leg was feeling very tight again. Again, I didn’t really think much of it.

I spent that night at my grandparents’ house, and laced up the next morning for a 5 mile run. Well, I made it about 3 miles before I was hobbling and crying from pain. Being my insane self… I forced myself to do at least one more mile… And then I had to stop. I couldn’t take it.

I had a therapy appointment and had to drive out about 45 minutes in severe pain. I made an appointment with my chiropractor for right after my therapy session and rushed there after. Unfortunately, due to the new health care laws, my chiropractor isn’t really able to spend as much time with each patient as she used to. So I was hooked up to the electric stim machine to loosen up the muscle for a while, and then she came in, looked at it, told me to go get an ace bandage, and wrapped my leg up with ice. She also worked on the muscle a little bit and I, one who has a VERY high pain tolerance, was sobbing. I can’t even explain the amount of pain.

Needless to say… She told me not to run. I, being the emotionally unstable person that I am, started, to my complete mortification, crying… Yup. Crying. Right there in front of everyone. I felt like the world was ending.

Like I said, quite the melodramatic post.

Here’s the thing, I had just come from therapy, and that already typically makes me more emotional that I usually am (and I am already a pretty emotional person). I had just had a great session, we spoke about how I have been scaring myself lately with how low I have been. I have been unable to find it in me to even text my best and only friend, let alone attempt to make new friends at my new school. I haven’t been able to find it in me to do my school work. Leaving my dorm to go to class is unbearable. My only salvation? Getting up and running every morning. Joanne (my absolutely amazing therapist) said how important it is for me that I even get up in the morning to run. It is the one thing that allows me to face the world. It is the one thing that makes me truly grateful for the body that I have and that makes me think about how much I truly love this world. It is the one thing that keeps me going and feeling like maybe I may have some sort of purpose in this world. I spend most of my time feeling like a failure. I don’t know what I am doing with my life. I don’t know what I am meant to do. I don’t know what my purpose is. I hate my body. I don’t have friends and I don’t feel as though I can handle having friends right now, yet I am terrified that I will now be alone forever. I feel as though I am wasting my college experience and that I am wasting my life.

But running makes me feel a glimpse of hope. It is the one thing that can actually make me feel ok about myself.

With my being in such a truly terrible place right now… I need my running now more than ever. And I can’t do that.

On top of that, I have no idea when I will be able to run again. It is my favorite season for running right now, and it only lasts a few weeks. Also, like I addressed the other day, I have gained weight and I am not ok with this… And now I really can’t workout except for the bike.

I am just at a complete loss. And I know that I am being stupid and dramatic and trust me, I of all people know that there are much worse things in this world than a temporary injury preventing me from running. It is just that I have really been scaring myself recently and running was my only salvation. I just feel like it is always something going wrong and I just don’t know what to do. Also, my mobility is very limited. I have trouble getting up and down the stairs due to pain, and walking is painful and problematic… I am not good at sitting an doing nothing. Again, I feel as though I am wasting time.

I just don’t know.

Sorry! I’ll try to be more positive tomorrow. I just really needed to vent.

On a more positive note… I put up a new makeup tutorial today! It’s a fall look inspired by the iconic autumn drink, the pumpkin spice latte. Hope you enjoy!

August In A Flash

Hey! 

Workout – A low impact workout sounded like a good idea this morning. I banged my knee pretty badly the other day and bruised the muscle. I’m not exactly the best at icing (I detest it so much… But I really should do it more)… So, I woke up this morning to a pretty gnarly looking bruise and a lot of swelling.

Tried a new to me elliptical workout from FitSugar.

 

And enjoyed my last smoothie bowl for a while (I got back to school today) post workout. Threw some spinach into the mix to get some more greens in before having to go back to school as well.

 

 

 

Topped with coconut chips and Loni Jane’s “rawnola.” The stuff seriously tastes like cookie dough. So flipping good.

 

So, terrifyingly enough, today is the first day of September! September has never exactly been my favorite month… I mean, not only does it mark the end of summer, but it’s just such an uneventful month! Not only is the celebration of summer over, but there are no holidays or festivities either. 

That being said, while August was a pretty rough month for me between losing my cousin, my severe panic attacks forcing me to quit my job in a less-than ideal way, and just having been in a bad place in general… There definitely were some good points in the month of August that I would rather focus on. 

So in August I was…

Reading…

I actually have yet to finish any of the books that I started in the month of August. I just haven’t been in the right mindset to sit and read. However, towards the end of the month when I was finding myself spending a lot of time on the train back and forth from the city, I’ve been making it a point to bring a book with me!

I have mentioned this book before, and it really is a gem.

 

Yes, another nutrition book revolving around a high-carb and plant-based diet. I have just really been interested in this particular type of diet recently and want to learn as much about it as I can… I also am loving getting proven information from accredited sources instead of all of the extremist types that I am finding on Youtube (not there are no good advocates of this lifestyle on Youtube). I just always love to know the science behind certain claims made in the health and fitness world.

I only started this book the other day… But I feel like it needs to be mentioned! Haruki Murakami is a genius and his writing style is just… I can’t even describe it. I just want to highlight every sentence to read over and over again because he weaves words together so beautifully. 

 

Listening To…

Brand New. Brand New. Brand New.

This concert was seriously one of the greatest experiences of my life. Not only was it the highlight of my month music-wise… But I think it was just the highlight of my month in general.

Also, I got to go with my best friend. So that made it all the more amazing.

 

Eating…

Need I even say it?

Nom.

Seeing…

I have taken in some pretty beautiful sights this month.

Other things…

I dyed my hair green.

 

I embarked on a new life journey at a new school in a new “home.”

 

I have remained consistent with my Youtube channel and have really pushed out of what would typically be my comfort zone.

As someone with a self confidence that is, to say the least, abysmal, putting myself on camera isn’t exactly easy. It’s hard enough when it is just my face on camera… But my latest video was a cookbook, which involves showing my entire self… Body and all. It may not seem like all that big of a deal, but it was seriously one of the most difficult things that I did this month. I’m kind of proud of myself so sucking it up and making myself so through with it.

 

So there you have it; August in a nutshell. 

 

Question(s):

1. What have you been loving this month?

2. When is the last time you pushed yourself out of your comfort zone? What did you do?

Friday Favorites 8.8.2014

Hey everyone! We have made it through another week!

Workout: 8 mile steady state run at an 8:38 min/mile average pace.

I don’t know what happened while I was asleep last night, but I actually woke up feeling motivated and energized! Last night, I didn’t even want to run (like I said, I’ve been having a rough time lately), and even upon waking up this morning I was doubting that I would even complete the 7 miles that I had planned on doing.

Well, the run went to so well that I wound up doing 8 miles instead of 7! Don’t you love it when that happens?

I felt great for a majority of my run, although I will say that my stomach started really acting up at about 6.5 miles in and I almost wound up stopping… But I pushed through and I don’t regret it!

It also didn’t hurt that my Pandora was on point today.

I actually squealed when this song came on. It was the intro to one of my absolute favorite video games growing up (actually, they are still coming out with games in this series), Kingdom Hearts. This just made my entire day.

 

 

 

n

 

A fail on my part was wearing capris to run in the summertime. I don’t understand why I decided to do that. Oh wait, maybe it’s because I really need to do laundry.

Now, let’s talk about some things that I have been loving this week!

For this week’s Friday Favorites, I thought that I would spice things up a bit and do something a little bit different.

As you all probably know (given the obnoxious number of times that I have mentioned it), I run a fashion and beauty Youtube channel. I really love it.. Like, I started the channel because it was something that I had been wanting to do since my freshman year of high school and had never had the confidence in myself/appearance to do so… Heck, I still don’t. But I was sick of telling myself why I couldn’t do it and I was tired of regretting not having made one all those years ago. So I have been consistently making weekly videos for a couple of months now.

And I am loving every second of it.

That being said, you all know that I love health and fitness… I mean, those things are pretty much the focus of this blog. But I am passionate about other things to, fashion being one of them. I just think it’s so wonderful and beautiful when people express who they are though their own individual fashion senses. That’s actually one of the things that I am most excited for about moving to New York City in a couple of weeks, the street style. People aren’t afraid to dress however they please in NYC and it is wonderful.

Ok, I’m going off on a tangent. What I was getting at is that I thought that I would share some of my favorite fashion finds of this week courtesy of my fall wish list Pinterest board!

1. Cat and Dog Suede Flats from Oasap

I have actually been eyeing these for over a year now, but have not been able to justify spending the money on them! There is a sale going on right now, so part of me wants to just suck it up and buy them… I know that they are definitely not going to be everyone’s taste, but I really love how both shoes are different and I think that they will add a fun youthful and quirky element to any outfit.

2. Sporty T-Shirt Dress from Topshop

Topshop is always a hit or miss for me… And more often or not, when it is in fact a hit… It’s a miss as far as pricing goes. This t-shirt dress is one of their newer products and I am absolutely OBSESSED! I love t-shirt dresses, and the almost iridescent material and sport jersey-like cut of this one is so unique and cool! I will say that it seems a bit long on the model, so that would mean that it would basically be down to my ankles since I am about two feet tall.

3. Chicwish Collared Dress

Another clothing item that I have been eyeing for quite some time. I love the sheer detailing on the shoulders and the silhouette of this dress. I’m not sure I am girly looking enough to pull it off, but I sure would like to try!

4. Yet another beautiful Chicwish dress.

It may be a bit early for this, but this dress just screams, “holiday season,” to me!

5. And finally, it’s not actually a clothing item… But, I may just need to get this backpack from Store Envy

 

 

I really want a timeless and chic bag for school that will also be practical for carrying all of my school necessities to and from my classes and I think this backpack may just be it!

Although, knowing me, I would get the white way too dirty!

 

So that’s it! I hope you enjoyed =).

 

Question(s):

What’s something you have been loving this week?

Do you like any of my favorites? Would you wear any of them? Let me know!

 

 

Friday Favorites 7.18.2014

Hey everyone!

It’s the end of yet another week. Does that terrify anyone else? Summer is seriously flying by far faster than I am comfortable with. I move into my room at my new school in just a little over a month.

Crazy stuff.

My morning began with waking up much later than usual… Well technically, I woke up at around 6:30am as per usual, but I actually managed to fall back into a light sleep until almost 8am! However, I didn’t get home last night until after one in the morning… So I’m still running on around 5 hours of sleep.

Waking up later than I am used to always winds up throwing my day off. I spent some time debating whether to go to the gym for a pool workout, or to forgo it in favor of an at-home workout for the sake of time.

Thank God I wound up choosing the pool workout because it was my best one to date!

Warmup – 50m freestyle, 100m breaststroke, 200m freestyle

Endurance Work – Nonstop swimming. No rest between sets.

100m freestyle pull

          100m freestyle kick

         100m freestyle

         repeat 2x… No rest in-between sets

Sprints –

4 x 50m IM style sprints (butterfly, backstroke, breaststroke, freestyle)

4 x 25m freestyle sprint

repeat 2x

Cooldown – 400m freestyle

And of course, I had to have an acai bowl post-workout. It had been a couple of days since my last bowl of frosty fruity goodness (I’m cringing at that description of my acai bowls), so I was definitely in desperate need of one!

(I was too hungry to take the time to take a pretty acai bowl picture…)

And now, here are a couple of things I have been loving lately!

1. Favorite Workout

Yesterday’s run. Hands down my best and happiest run in a long while.

I’m sorry, but I just can’t even deal with how beautiful it was.

Still rocking my knee brace though.

 

2. Favorite Eat:

Wednesday’s dinner at the Dockside Bar and Grill in Sag Harbor has to have been the best thing I have eaten in a long while.

Any place that will serve me a portion of broccoli and asparagus that is larger than my head is a winner in my book.

They also make the tortilla chips (unpictured) that they serve with guacamole and salsa right before they bring them out to you so they are warm and delicious and perfect.

3. Favorite Listen:

Been jamming out to “Infamous” by the band Motionless in White all week. It’s not as much of a good song as it is a catchy one. It also gets me super pumped up during workouts!

4. Favorite Links

1. I need to make this summer soup like… now.

2. Ever since my experimentation with raw vegan sushi, I have been wanting to to            dabble more in the use of nori in recipes. These “snack wraps” are definitely on my, “must try,” list!

3. I just found The Detoxinista blog the other day and I am hooked! I want to try     everything!

5. Favorite Look

(source)

(source)

I don’t think you understand how badly I want a pair of overalls… I mean, I already get mistaken for a 12 year old on a daily basis (I’m not even joking), so why not just roll with it and fully commit to the look?

In all seriousness though, I think overalls are pretty rad looking when worn the right way.

I hope you all have a great day/evening!

Question(s):

What do you think of Friday Favorites posts? Do they seem like nothing more than fillers on the blog or are they actually fun? Personally, I like them. I need to get more organized in keeping a list of things that I read and see and eat over the course of the week so that I can make these posts better.

Overalls? Love them? Hate them? Wish that they would all be set on fire in a mass overall sacrifice? Let me know!

Style Saturday

Hey all! I’ve decided to do a weekly segment called Style Saturday! … Or at least that is what it will be temporarily called, I need to think of a better, less over-used name. 

This blog is called Snapbacks and Racing Flats for a reason. While I am extremely passionate about running and fitness in general, and while this blog is very much just a lifestyle (or just a life in general) blog, I also love fashion and makeup and music and the purpose of having this blog is having a way express all of my different interests. It is my outlet, since I know that my future career won’t be in all of the fields that I am passionate about.

So basically, I thought it would be fun to do a little segments about my personal sense of style every Saturday. What I am going to do is take certain items from my Pinterest and put them together into outfits that I either own or would love to own… or that I would love to be able to pull off…

Just a stupid little disclaimer here, but I just want to say that I’m not claiming to be any sort of super professional fashionista or anything. I just happen to really enjoy putting outfits together and spend WAY too much time on the computer doing so. 

So here we go!

 

 

This outfit is just super duper casual and something that most emulates my everyday sense of style (minus the jeans, I hate how jeans look on me… wish I could pull them off though). Just an oversized band-t (Brand New!), distressed jeans that are cuffed at the ankle, converse, and a head chain to dress it up a little bit!

Head chain – SheInside

Brand New The Devil and God shirt – Hot Topic

Jeans – Charlotte Russe 

Sneakers – Converse

This next outfit is a tiny bit dressier but still casual. I love a-line dresses more than anything, I think they just have such a youthful and casual feel to them. The little hearts on the tights add to the cuteness of the look and then some chunkie booties toughen up the look slightly.

Dress and tights – Oasap

Booties – Boohoo

I had one more look for you.. but unfortunately the program I am using to put the pictures of the clothes together keeps crashing. I’ll have to include it in next week. I hope you enjoyed this little segment and I look forward to talking to you guys tomorrow! Bye!